It's My Life

Last Thursday afternoon, as I was walking around Yale to get to my Arabic class my mind was racing with all the stress of college applications. I was so confused by this that I ended up walking into one person, dropping my umbrella (in the pouring rain, nonetheless) and spilling scolding coffee on my shirt. When I finally made it to class in one piece my Arabic teacher said to me,

            “What happened to you?”

So I summarize my adventures to him and the rest of my class. Immediately his expression turned very serious and he said to me:

“For the two years that I have known you, you have always been so focused on your Arabic, and your AP tests, and volunteering, that I always feel like you have no time for yourself”

“I do have time for myself, but I need to do everything that I do in order to succeed”

“As far as I can tell, I am a professor at Yale University, and I never did anything that you did, I focused on what made me happy, and I succeeded that way”

There was nothing else that I could say to him because deep down inside I knew that he was right. As I finally settled down to start taking notes, I started thinking about what he had said. Mr. Nasr was right, I do too much, and I have very little time for myself. He was telling me what every one had been telling me my whole life, “just be happy.” I had always thought that I was living my life my way, and in a sense I am; however, I am also doing things in order to please others despite how it makes me feel.  Currently the people that I have been trying to please are the college admissions people. However, it was on Thursday night that I finally realized that this insane competition to get me into college was not making me happy at all. I realized that the cards have been dealt and that there is no more use in stressing over college because what is done, is done. I have always been so busy doing what my father and colleges have been telling me to do, that I have developed some form of Stockholm syndrome, in the sense that I began liking everything that I have been doing.

            When Mr. Nasr, my forever-wise Arabic teacher, essentially told me that I had to relax I realized that happiness is more important than anything. I realized right then and there that there that I should try to do only things that I enjoy doing. Happiness is what gives life value, why go through life unhappy? Happiness leads us to be confident and caring. Therefore, doing what makes you happy is incredibly important. In my case my obligations and my happiness sometimes overlap; however, other times they are two incredibly different things. 

This having been said, I do not plan on relaxing any time soon. Trust me when I say that I am counting down the days until summer vacation; however, until finals week in June, I cannot stop running around, I cannot relax. My obligations to school, my boss, my parents, the kids who I baby-sit and work with at a daycare, and my friends are too important to simply ignore. When Mr. Nasr told me that life is better when we just relax he was absolutely correct, and I know that one day I will be able to do what makes me happy; however for now, accomplishing what is asked of me, and doing it well, so that I will be remembered takes priority over my own happiness.

Do not get me wrong though, I enjoy what I do and I have no complaints other than I am sleep deprived. I enjoy going to work and spending my afternoons playing, learning from, and teaching children. I enjoy most of the schoolwork that I am assigned to do, and I enjoy spending time with friends and family. I only wish that I could take a mental health day, and sit in front of my TV for hours watching senseless shows, and then going to bed at 8.

In conclusion, when Mr. Nasr stopped class to ask me what was wrong, I realized how I had been living my life. The advice that he gave me will stick with me forever and it will always be in the back of my mind (most likely because I’ll remember all the unfortunate incidents that went along with that advice). By the end of that class, I had learned very little Arabic and a whole lot of life. 

The meaning of Life

As human beings we all know that we re going to die, and as a result of that knowledge we attempt to figure out what the purpose of life is. For all of us the purpose of life is different since we all hope to achieve something different. I do not think that we ever consciously decide what the purpose of our life is. But rather, it presents itself to us as we gain knowledge, experience, and age. In my case, for example, I cannot pretend to know what the purpose of my life is. I do; however, know that there are certain things that I want to achieve before I die.

            As I watch people close to me get older I try to understand what makes their lives valuable. Watching these people has made me realize that there is absolutely no purpose to life if we cannot enjoy it. Life is valuable because we get to experience things on our own, we get to learn, love, and grow, but if in the end we are not happy than all of that had no meaning. Therefore, my biggest goal that I thrive to achieve is to be able to look back on my life when I am old and dying, and be happy with that I have accomplished.

            Being happy is a universal search and critical to humanity. Having a world full of unhappy people would led to chaos

            In order to achieve this happiness, there are several things that I think I need. The first and most important being a family that loves me. The person that I most respect in my life is my grandfather. He has not done anything particularly special with his life worth merit, but what he has done is created a family who unconditionally loves him. This family consists not only of children and grandchildren but aunts, uncles, nieces, son in laws, and friends. To me this is his biggest achievement, and I hope that when I grow older I will have a family who is close to each other and who loves each other and will stand by each other through anything.

            Another thing that I would like to accomplish before the end of my life would be to have ethics, which I will stand by. This is valuable to me because my father has always taught me that success is nothing if you do not have ethics. As I began working in the real world and at school I realized that this is true. Its so much easier to get what you want if you take short cuts and hurt others but I would rather achieve what it is I want by being a good and honest person. This idea is not only important to me but also humanity because the reason our society runs the way it does is because there are some people with ethics who keep honesty alive. Without ethics our world would crumble and we would be wild.

            Before establishing exactly what my ethics are; however, another thing that I need to achieve is finding and defining myself. I do not know what I will find, and how I will find it but I hope that before I die I will know who I am. This idea of self-realization goes along with my happiness because I cannot be happy until I know who I am and what I am meant to do. At this moment I think that I know what I have to do, but this can easily change as I get older. Therefore, I hope that my life will be able to define me. I think that it is important for all of humanity that people find themselves because it gives people value and purpose, which in turn gives humanity value.

            One last thing that I truly want to accomplish before the end of my life would be to travel. Travel is important because it helps us accept other cultures and it helps our global awareness. Many problems in our world today were caused by the lack of knowledge and acceptance of other people, cultures, and religions. By traveling I hope to learn and understand the differences in our world. Among the countries I want to visit would be African countries and India.

            Although everyone has different goals in life, I believe that there are goals which are universal. I believe that we are all in our own ways looking for happiness. In my case, I hope that happiness, ethics, family, self-realization, and cultural acceptance will give my life value. I think that the search for the meaning of life has taken place since the beginning of time, and will continue forever. Our lives have been explained in many different ways over the years, whether it be through religion, myth, science, or medicine, we have always attempted to explain our existence. Maybe though, it is better to just live our lives and see where we are taken.